thinking, that is. at the doc’s office last week, i was reading time magazine’s “10 ideas that are changing the world.” i found a few of them to be interesting.

the new austerity surprised me because it doesn’t seem like people truly are changing their view of debt… and the idea that debt is a four-letter word isn’t a new idea, anyway. my grandmother despised it. maybe it’s like fashion and coming back in style to dislike it? regarding the economic stimulus package, a poll by cnn showed that “41% of respondents plan to use their rebates to pay off bills, and 32% will put the money in savings. Just 21% of those polled intend to spend the money, while 3% said they will donate the extra money to charity.” so maybe i’m just jaded and think most people will blow it. i’ve been weird too long.

re-judaizing jesus sort of confused me. i didn’t realize he was un-judaized but maybe spending all these years at a bible church has spoiled me? have churches failed to teach who jesus is? this is one that is making my brain hurt trying to figure out what they’re saying in this article.

synthetic authenticity – i got a kick out of this one, even though i haven’t yet worked out the real/fake matrix on the book’s website . i think i may have to get my hands on this book and see what they’re saying exactly. it sort of makes me question what’s real and what’s fake out there. i mean, i know when we went to disneyworld that it is a completely manmade world. but we had a great time there – our experience, our fun… was real. based on the matrix, i think it falls in the fake-real category… what is interesting about this concept is the authors’ claim that authenticity is personally determined. which makes it subjective rather than objective. my brain is really hurting now. i think they’re on to something when it comes to corporate america’s marketing strategies but they may be spot on about how we live our lives here in america in general. i long to be able to be “real” with people without being judged. but it hurts too much to be burned like that so i just hide behind my fake smile like everyone else.

Bee Movie – This was at my brother’s house on Saturday and I didn’t catch all of it, but what I saw was cute. I wouldn’t buy it, though.

Enchanted – I had heard good things about this one while it was in the theater, and was pleasantly surprised to find myself enjoying it. Even my boys laughed, which is saying a LOT for a Disney princess movie!

Maxed Out – We’ve been wanting to see this one for awhile and my husband and I watched it this afternoon. *blows out a long breath* I thought it was very well done, but depressing. Probably would be good for all high school juniors and seniors to watch before they head to college.

August Rush – We watched this one together tonight and all enjoyed it. A feel-good movie – a nice way to end the weekend.

I started reading aloud the Chronicles of Narnia to my younger two boys this week – it feels like it does when I put on my slippers – warm, comfy and familiar, feels like home. We have been having tea time along with it. Sort of like Lucy and Mr. Tumnus, but without the sardines.

Is the fact that I keep seeing scary stories about Ciudad Juarez a warning not to send my child there for a mission trip? Or am I only noticing these because the enemy wants me to be fearful? How can I tell? Am I the only parent questioning?

To be honest, I’m not sure why God impressed it upon my husband and I to homeschool our children. It wasn’t something I’d ever even heard of until my first child was probably 3 or 4 years old. But once the Lord compelled me, there was just no other thing but to do it.

When one of my children was born with a vascular malformation known as a Port Wine Stain I thought, “Hmmm, maybe this child is why we homeschool… it is easier to seek treatments without worrying about school work to be made up, not to mention the social problems that he would have to face daily in a public school.”

I have a child with eye problems; he is my youngest. I don’t know what challenges, if any, we’ll face when learning to read… but I know that I can tailor his education to his needs in our homeschool environment. Maybe this child is why we homeschool.

I have a child that was recently diagnosed with Crohn’s disease. Having this disease in a school setting could be quite stressful for a child. Maybe this child is why we homeschool.

Now I’m thinking that maybe there is not a specific reason that we do this. It hasn’t ever been because of “religious” reasons – I don’t believe it’s mandated by God that people homeschool (people actually say that!). It’s just obedience to what God has placed on *my* heart. All those other things above are just side benefits.

In any case, it is a very personal decision. Some people say, “Oh, I could never do that!” Yes, you could – if the Lord compelled you to do it. My temptation is to reply, “Oh, I could never put my children in public school!” But that’s not true. If the Lord compelled me to, I could. I know that I am ornery and hardheaded and dealing with the politics of a traditional school setting would be very difficult for me. I knew it as soon as they told me we couldn’t get morning kindergarten because the priority went to the daycare children (now Kindergarten is all day, which makes me sad). Not to mention getting them all to do their homework after a long day in the classroom! I admire public school parents!

I don’t think either way is an easy road. But I am thankful to be able to choose. And praying for my fellow homeschoolers in California.

we play this game where we see who can be the first to figure out what movie is playing on the dvd player in the car in front of us (or beside us, as the case may be). last night on the way to pick up my son from bible study, it was “how to eat fried worms.” i was pleasantly surprised by that movie – i was expecting it to be really bad, but it wasn’t.

maybe i should do that for all movies (have low expectations), but i enjoy movies in general, even the “predictable” ones. it always drives me bonkers when you ask someone how a movie was and they say, “predictable.” duh, aren’t most of them? i want to know was it good, bad or just okay. so what if it was predictable? if i sit and project endings for movies while i’m watching them, i don’t enjoy the movie as much. as often as i hear a movie is predictable, i guess i’m in the minority on that! i like to sit back and get sucked in to the story without wondering how it will end. *steps off soapbox*

it was really a snowball fight in the dark with my 2 youngest boys. what fun we had! turns out my older boys were also having a snowball fight at their troop meeting. we built a tiny snowman on the patio table. i came inside to cut a tiny sliver of carrot for his tiny face. my 5yo started calling “Mom!” so i came out. the boys were up in the fort of the swingset. then they ambushed me with snowballs… but they all missed so i taunted them about it. when they started to look frozen we came in and warmed up by the fireplace and had hot chocolate.

and speaking of billy idol (heard that song “dancing with myself” the other day at the hair cut place) – whatever happened to him? i liked his songs.

it’s only march, but…

disney world
on a plane
got some rain
soaked our shoes
got some sun
home to freezing weather
doctor…….. doctor…………
doctor.doctor.doctor
diagnosis crohn’s disease
no cure
big gun drugs
sad… scared…
why my child
why not me
second opinion
same diagnosis
not-so-scary drugs to try
feeling better
will it work
i don’t know
reading, reading, reading
to learn all i can about this disease
and reading to learn all i can about
natural gas drilling
protestors near my neighborhood
‘just say no to urban drilling’
won’t they just drill anyway
might as well try to minimize the bad
and maximize the good of it?
i don’t know
the older i get, the less i know

wondering what the rest of the year will bring