You can order personalized Sharpies here, and the quantities are reasonable now! What a cool gift or stocking stuffer! As a confirmed Sharpie freak, mine would probably say my name and something along the lines of:

Put it down. NOW!

U can’t touch this!

Property of the freak

*starts to mull over the Christmas list but isn’t sure everyone would appreciate the gift of Sharpies - hard to imagine*